@TieALitleRibbon thanks! I was…

@TieALitleRibbon thanks! I was pretty proud of that little deal.

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Now the child has turned right…

Now the child has turned right side up and has taken to riverdancing on my cervix. SO MUCH FUN. #ouchie

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@TieALitleRibbon No, I ordered…

@TieALitleRibbon No, I ordered them from Amazon. But I did do a victory chair spin at my desk.

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I got a box of 140 diapers for…

I got a box of 140 diapers for $30 today. A box of 60 at Walmart costs $25. #momwin #lametweet

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I am the best knot detangler i…

I am the best knot detangler in all the land! In related news, I really need a jewelry armoire.

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Evidently Old McDonald raises …

Evidently Old McDonald raises dolphins and giraffes on his farm. Never hurts to diversify. What sound does a giraffe make?

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It is so hot in my office, I m…

It is so hot in my office, I might pass out. Maintenance!

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Dear Sarah Palin: sit down, sh…

Dear Sarah Palin: sit down, shut up, and let the smart, qualified people handle this. Smoochies, Rachel.

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@lawmomma77 I do that frequent…

@lawmomma77 I do that frequently. Nothing like baby boy snuggles. They're good for the soul.

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Accidentally made a pitcher of…

Accidentally made a pitcher of crack tea. It's gonna be sooooo good tomorrow!

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